Journals of Perez

It was past 11pm of a Sunday evening, my heart was burning hot with questions that I needed answers to, but could not figure out on my own. As I grew increasingly restless, I decided to reach out to my friend Ayo. I get clarity sharing with her, and I was desperate for some of that. The following narrative is a summary of the conversation that ensued. I believe that this conversation is one that every man should read, and not just men, but the women in their lives.  **** I knew it was a bit too late to be messaging Ayo, but I was going to take the chance. I needed to get these thoughts out of my head. So I shot Ayo a message.  Me: Hey Ayo, [are you] free? Ayo: Hello, yeah.  Me: I wanted to run some things by you to get some clarity. Is that fine by you?  Ayo: Please go ahead.  Me: As a young lady yeah? What are the things that you would see in a young man to 100% know that he'd make a good husband? Ayo : Hmmm...dicey question. To be honest, what will make a ...

Sometimes innocence is a gift... the gift of being cocooned in a small and secured place, away from the harsh reality and corrupting influences of this world. But then, there is the need for growth. The kind of growth that demands for us to step out of our comfort zone to explore the unfamiliar. Such forays presents us with many opportunities. One of which is the opportunity to discover hidden biases and blind spots that could be dangerous if left unchecked. The opportunity to have our lived and learned experiences challenged, forcing us to build a more holistic worldview. The opportunity to subject our convictions under scrutiny, and to earth them in deeper layers of TRUTH. When exposed to such new currents, even the best of us can be lost without solid convictions, and the support of a community to reinforce the same. I believe that, people who migrate have had to face and answer these questions in one way or another. This is especially true for our 'Japa brethren' who are ha...